waiting to live

I burned your love

As unceremoniously as I could manage

And scattered it’s ashes to the wind.

I wept until my tears ran out and

In the years since

I haven’t cried again.

The wound your parting words left

I cauterized with every cheap pleasure

I could muster.

Wrapped in that numbness

I could move, except

My gait was heavier,

My hair grew thinner,

And my smile had vanished.

I had never learned

To love myself.

I gave you everything, and when you left

There was nothing of me to recover.

Looking back at who I was, I ask

If that was for the best?