waiting to live

What does it take

To be truly free?

Free from this heavy smile,

From the regret that hangs over me,

Free from the loneliness

That aches in every bone…

What does it take

To find people worth my time?

That I’ll invest my hopes in

And have them invest in me

With no expectation of reward

Just a faith in my worth,

How long! Oh

How long I have waited

To see the day my dreams would come

And save me from the pit I carved,

For the rays of light that danced

Just beyond my grasp.

How long I have waited

To have someone embrace me

With no hesitation or fear,

To be welcomed, to belong,

To be dear to someone, to anyone!

To have no doubts left…

And gradually,

Like waking from a long dream

I can see that light all around me

And within me, reaching out.

Even though I suffer still

My smile doesn’t, my hope doesn’t,

Because I am free!

In a way that took time to believe,

Free from my own delusions,

Free from seeing people as I want to

But as they are,

And in turn to be seen, and loved…

Exactly the way I am,

And for nothing more or less.